I have an older sister who has behavior that I'd like your input on. We're close in age, but as the older one, she always had to be first, always the best, always the center of attention. Unfortunately, my parents were intimidated by her and now as a 28 year old, she's still the same way.
My biggest issue is that if we go to a family function, the moment someone even says hello to me, she starts getting nervous and emotional and will either storm out of the room, get angry, or even try to leave the function altogether. I understand it more when someone tells me they like my dress, she gets jealous and angry, but I've been in that place before and I just learned to cope with the fact that some days I look good and other days I could look better. But getting soo angry about someone complimenting me, or even acknowledging my existence shouldn't upset her so much. The last time something happened my dad told me that she can't cope with anything that doesn't go her way, but its not like my parents ask her to compromise in the first place either. It really sucks because I feel like even tho that's bad karma for her, it seems like she still has everything and I'm the one losing out because my self esteem is always put down when the whole family praises her for every little thing, and therefore she continues to do well in spite of how rude she is to me. What are your thoughts? It just doesn't seem normal to me that she will cry- to my younger brother if I stand up for myself and call her out on her bad behavior toward me (diplomatically), at her age.1 AnswerPsychology7 years ago
Is it possible that I need to strengthen them more in order not to be over stretched? Whenever I stretch as close as I can into the splits, slowly, this is the second time it feels the kind of sore where its been overdone. But I dance and I stretch all the time. Do you think my quads need to be strengthened instead? Thanks in advance for answers!3 AnswersDancing8 years ago
A while back, a lifelong friend of mine started to visit me at my college because he was doing an internship an hour away. He'd pick me up, take me out to a movie, or to a fun place downtown, and treat me to dinner, and he'd buy me chocolates too. It was seeming like he was taking us past the 'just friends' stage but he wasn't saying so. So I just played it cool for a little while, b/c I wasn't sure if we had different views of what was 'just friends' and what was more. I thought, maybe he's being so generous because we've known each other for so long.
He kept texting when he'd hear a news story about things I was concerned over, he'd chat with me online a lot, and it seemed to me that he may not have realized that I felt like he was courting me. He kept asking when we could hang out, and truthfully I was really busy with school. And then one day I got injured and couldn't walk for a couple of months. I had to miss a semester of school and go home to recover. This 'friend' would keep in touch with me, asking what the doctor said, how I was healing, etc. He really wanted to hang out, and I told him that my parents were making me go back to school as soon as I was back on my feet, because I had so much school work to make up. So he told me that he would drive to my college to see me, no matter! I was shocked- its a 7 hour drive each way! He came over and I was really flattered and so happy that someone was making me feel really special. He helped me with chores in the apt, and took me out for every meal, and drove me to my doctor's appt. It was really sweet. He would gaze into my eyes, give me massages, and he kept getting closer to me when we'd talk as if he wanted to kiss me. While we talking that night, he had his arms around me, and I confessed to him that I liked him. I understood that we were friends, but I felt that he should know that that's how I feel about him. He said he appreciated my honesty but that he has a girlfriend---------------all that time he was talking to me and courting me he never told me that he was seeing someone!! I was really beside myself. He told me that they were breaking up on and off but it was serious now. So weird!! I just told myself not to take his flirtatious ways seriously anymore, because it obviously didn't mean the same thing to him as it did to me. He left, and then broke up with his girlfriend, and came back to visit me and kissed me. I really didn't know what to do, but at the time, I thought that he already knew how I felt, and maybe he was ready to make it clear that he liked me too...even if the timing was odd. I thought he was going to back off and tell me that the kiss was a mistake, but he didn't....so we just made out, but he wouldn't kiss me until I looked into his eyes.
Well, after he left, he kept in touch with me for 2 weeks...and then he slowly started to disappear. And then he just stopped talking to me altogether. It really hurts that someone who I've known my whole life- who treated me like a princess, vanished w/o even acknowledging what happened, or acknowledging that my feelings were really hurt. I tried to ask him to explain to me what was going on via e-mail and said that it's ok if he doesn't want to talk to me, I just would like to know what the situation was so that I could move on. He never wrote back, and for some reason I can't let it go. I feel like he knows better than this, and that he didn't intend to hurt me, but he did anyway. I can't understand it. Even if he got back with his ex, he could have at least told me that it was time for us to go our separate ways. Without closure, I think it's just hard to know if his feelings for me were true-- and even though they faded, doesn't it seem like they were real for the times he traveled the distance to see me?
...Do you think he's ever thought about me and just not had the courage to confront me?2 AnswersSingles & Dating8 years ago
I've studied art and dance my whole life, and I just graduated college in May. I currently work at a world renowned dance company. I love it, and it's my dream come true, but in order for me to go further in the arts, I need a better paying job to help support it. I was thinking I could do something else part time.
My skills are- ballet, modern dance
Lots of experience teaching grades pre-k to high school
fine art- painting, drawing, mixed media
retail experience- high end clothing store
fluent in many languages
....i don't know...my sister does microenterprise development (making small businesses bigger in developing countries)....and I'm thinking about going down that road. What are your thoughts?1 AnswerOther - Careers & Employment8 years ago