What should I expect dating an 18-year-old, unmedicated, BIPOLAR-1 with borderline schizophrenia?

Question

His last relationship lasted 6 months, which is very impresive for an 18-year-old with BIPOLAR-1; however he did cheat.

He is a high school drop out (twice), had to go to foster care for 6 months when he was 16-years-old, and works part-time at mcdonalds. He moved out of his parents house at 17 and lives with a roommate. He pays $200 rent per month.

Anyways, he drinks and smokes weed a lot, and cigarettes. I dont know how he affords to buy it all, and pay rent, on his mcdonalds income.

He use to take 400mg of SEROQUEL and was awesome, but ever since he stopped going to therapy and taking his nighly meds he has become cold-hearted and selfish.

What should I expect dating a teenage, unmedicated, bipolar-1 with borderline schizphrenia?

Answer 1

Best Answer - Chosen by Voters

You should not expect good things from this guy. He is in deep trouble if he doesn’t take his medication. And doing drugs and drinking will kill him or he will try to commit suicide. Is that the kind of boyfriend you want for yourself? This guy does not know what the word responsible means. Even if he wasn’t bipolar-1 with borderline schizophrenia just the fact that he’s a school drop out and drinks, does drugs, and smokes almost his salary then how is this guy really going to turn out later on in life. He knows that he has to be on medication. He knows that he not allowed to stop his medication. So, it’s clear that he doesn’t care what really happens to him. And if he doesn’t care what happens to him then he’s not going to care about the girl that he’s involved with. Why in the name of God would you want to be with someone like that?

Answer 2

A lot of the unexpected and nothing good if he's unmedicated and drinking...Not good.

Answer 3

Beware!

Answer 4

Definitely nothing good, especially if he isn't on medication and had serious mental conditions; let alone drinking, smoking weed, and cigarettes often. He could lash out at you, hurt you, verbally abuse you, and make you miserable. It'll be heartbreaking to see all this happen or watch him do all of this to himself and you really shouldn't let a relationship like this wear you down. He's got a split personality due to the diagnosis you provided, and that's definitely not good for a positive relationship. If you're not confident in how things will turn out, especially if you're asking Y!A about it, then don't even bother. You probably have better things in life to focus on rather than a relationship like this with a problematic boy. It'll just add drama and stress you really don't deserve.

Sometimes it feels impossible to find someone who's right for you — and who thinks you're right for him or her! So when it happens, you're usually so psyched that you don't even see the world around you or the bad things that may be going on.

It's totally normal to look at the world through rose-colored glasses in the early stages of a relationship. But for some people, those rose-colored glasses turn into blinders that keep them from seeing that a relationship isn't as healthy as it should be.

In a healthy relationship, everyone needs to make compromises. But that doesn't mean you should feel like you're losing out on being yourself. When you started going out, you both had your own lives (families, friends, interests, hobbies, etc.) and that shouldn't change. Neither of you should have to pretend to like something you don't, or give up seeing your friends, or drop out of activities you love. And you also should feel free to keep developing new talents or interests, making new friends, and moving forward.

A relationship is unhealthy when it involves mean, disrespectful, controlling, or abusive behavior. Some people live in homes with parents who fight a lot or abuse each other — emotionally, verbally, or physically. For some people who have grown up around this kind of behavior it can almost seem normal or OK. It's not! Many of us learn from watching and imitating the people close to us. So someone who has lived around violent or disrespectful behavior may not have learned how to treat others with kindness and respect or how to expect the same treatment.

It can be tempting to make excuses or misinterpret violence, possessiveness, or anger as an expression of love. But even if you know that the person hurting you loves you, it is not healthy. No one deserves to be hit, shoved, or forced into anything he or she doesn't want to do.

I would highly suggest NOT getting into a relationship with this boy if you have a feeling it will turn out for the worse.

Need expert advice? Try these options.

Visit saynotoviolence.org or go to loveisrespect.org to IM/chat with trained peer advocates.

You can also call the National Teen Dating Abuse Hotline at 866-331-9474.

Source(s):

Personal Experience. I used to date a guy who was on probation, partied, drank, smoked cigarettes, and weed. He was nice, but in the end, he turned out to be a player. Not even a few weeks after we broke up, he had sex with 3 different girls (2 of which were quickies in the back of his car) and got together with a girl he was obviously cheating on. I'm glad I never got past making out with him because really... who knows what diseases he could've had??? He was a player and probably just using me for sex.

http://kidshealth.org/teen/your_mind/rel…

Answer 5

Tell him he needs to get on meds and, start going back to therapy ASAP or, the relationship is over!!!! Because, A Bi-Polar individual that, is not on meds, is like living with the Devil!!!!

I am not saying this to be mean. I am saying this from experience.

Join a Yahoo discussion group, via Yahoo Groups called 'Spouses 2 Bipolars'. I was a member for 4.5yrs.

The Bipolar husband of, one of the members, got manic at one point, skipping out on the money he owed his soon-to-be(at the time)-ex-wife. A private investigator found the Bipolar husband, 2,000mi. away, in another state, with another woman. He was picked up by the local police and, arrested.

EDIT: Whoever gave me a thumbs down, obviously doesn't know what it is like, living with someone, that is Bi-Polar, not on meds AND, not in any form of psychotherapy.

My (ex)fiance 'diagnosed' me with ADD, ADHD, Bi-Polar Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder, Diabetes, Hypoglycemia, Multiple Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder, Panic Disorder, PTSD, Social Anxiety Disorder AND, Tourettes.

I finally had had enough of her 'diagnosing' me and, I called her on it. By telling her, I would no longer just let her 'diagnose' me, she claimed I was keeping her from speaking her mind.

All the 'diagnoses', were emotional abuse and, I knew she was not in her right mind.

Source(s):

Engaged to a Bi-Polar II woman Oct.'02-Jan.'07

She almost got me arrested by lying to the police.

Answer 6

You can expect trouble. Being a teenage yourself I doubt you can handle his mood swings without getting drawn in yourself. Steer clear.

Answer 7

The problem is that you cannot quite be sure what to expect. You also forgot in your description that he most likely possibliy an alcoholic who abuses marijuana.

To be honest even medicated, those are some big problems to take on, and he is unmeidcated.

You don't know what to expect, you could be walking into any number of things every day, running the gamuts from severely depressive, suicidal, paranoia to extreme happiness and everything in between.


Not to be honest, I wouldn't even date somebody abusing Marijuana, that it itself can create unpredictable mood swings and erratic behavior, compound that with a host of underlying physciatric problems and you have a potential time bomb on your hands.

Run away, run far far away.

Answer 8

He will probably stuff you into a carboot and pushit off a cliff, then blame his unmedicated condition. You are asking for trouble - unfortunately i think you know it.

Answer 9

Nothing Good can come from this. I was in the same spot Two years ago. And I ended up in a very Abusive relationship for two years. And when I tried to break it off for my own sake he threatened to kill me. And now has a restraining order and lots of therapy. Not saying you can't give him a chance everyone deserves to be loved........ Just be careful because people like this.. can become total whack jobs! and go completely insane on you. Good luck.

Source(s):

experience

Answer 10

Terminate your relationship with him. He is not being responsible as a very old teenager. He could possibly kill you because of his BIPOLAR-1 with borderline schizophrenia. We had an employee with a BIPOLAR condition and because he did not take his medication, he stalked the wife of one our supervisors. He was arrested and to make the long story short his job was terminated and went to jail.

I'm sorry, but crazy or mentally disturbed people be should not be dating or married until they are cured.

Source(s):

Life experiences

Answer 11

SEROQUEL is the best drug ever! I use it to help me sleep as my head talks too much about my past, present and future.

He needs help. being off his meds isn't a good thing. weed is number one cause of schizophrenia but can also calm down a shitzophrenic person so it all depends on the person. Drinking is bad even worse on meds.

I personally wouldn't date him. he needs help badly. i know you want to help him but he can only help himself since he chose not to take the meds and all.

I'm sorry you are in this situation as i don't know what to do... but take him back to the doctor and tell the doctor that he's not taking his meds and he really needs to because your worried about him and yourself (as in saftey)

bipolar and shitzophrenics are so unpredictable it's not funny.
one minute they are your bestfriend, next minute your an introoder in their home and their natural response is too attack...

i hope someone can give you the answers your looking for

Answer 12

Can you please follow this URL and read the responses there, too? You will find valuable information also on this other page regarding the Bipolar if you can get to it, and my URL works...it should. Please click on this below and read all the responses there, as well as the original question...a very good page to have a look at indeed.

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;…

Answer 13

There is nothing impressive about anybody who cheats. It means he's trash and you can't trust him any more than she (his ex) could trust him. You should never get involved with anyone who drinks or smokes "weed" either, whether they are bipolar or not. And you shouldn't be breathing his second-hand cigarette smoke, either, for that matter. That could give you all sorts of lung problems, potentially. And it IS fishy, how he can afford all that on his salary. And you will be in for all sorts of trouble and frankly, you will be in for hell, if you choose a bipolar for a boyfriend. Has he ever asked you for any money, by any chance? If he hasn't already, I predict he will. And that will be just one part of all the trouble you will face, with him.

When he goes into a depressed phase, most likely he will cut off all contact completely with you and abandon you. He will only want to see you at his convenience, according to his mood, on his terms. And you will hate it, just like any girl would. He also proved how irresponsible he was by stopping therapy...were his parents paying for that? I'm sorry for him that he's mentally ill but he doesn't have the right to hurt you or drag you down, because of that or for any other reason. Don't expect anything from him but primarily trouble. There may be some happy moments when he's in a good mood but the bad moments will be terrible. My advice is to stay away from him and pick somebody stable. Sorry. Listen carefully please to people who have had bipolar people in their lives...so many of them will tell you it could be awful at times. Be ready, he could start lashing out and snapping at you for every little thing and get really snippy. He may also start blaming YOU for HIS own problems. I hope he never gets violent with you. Whatever you do, please never have kids with him. Please also watch out for disease. He may go wild when he is in Mania or at any time, really, and go out having unprotected sex with multiple women, for all you know.

Please be aware of HPV not just AIDS and the others. Certain strains of Human Papilloma can kill you with cancer. I'm sorry you fell for him. You can expect that "cold-hearted and selfish" attitude of his to repeat itself over and over. Good luck.