What sort of legal hurdles would I have to jump through on this situation?

Question

Hi, sorry if this is a little long-winded, it's a complicated situation.

My wife & I are Canadians, and my cousin is an American. My cousin has for many years been diagnosed as bi-polar, and been mentally unstable for quite some time.

She showed up back at my uncles house a few months ago, several months pregnant, and not mentally sound. She's been committed again, but is planning on having the baby.

The mental hospital has told my uncle that my cousin will not be allowed to take care of this baby, as she is mentally unfit, and unless someone can be found to adopt, the baby will be going into foster care.

My uncle, and the rest of my family, seem to be trying to distance themselves from the situation as much as they can, and no-one seems to want to do anything for this child.

The babys father isn't in the picture at this point. We don't know much about him, as my cousins description could be a delusion. If she is speaking the truth about him, he's not stable enough to take care of a child either.

My wife & I do not want to see this child lost in the foster system, but don't have any idea what to do about adoption or anything else like this, and we have so many questions and we don't even know who to ask.

We are prepared for the likelihood that this child already has some damage done to it, due to the fact that her mother probably did not stop taking drugs for the first 5 months before she was committed.

But with my cousin not likely to give this baby up willingly, us being in different countries, and a father who none of us know anything reliable about, where do I turn to find information out about what can be done, and what kind of obstacles are likely to come up in the process?

Answer 1

Best Answer - Chosen by Voters

A Family Law attorney will be able to answer your questions in full.

Why not attempt to gain guardianship of your cousin's baby? Then if the baby's mother can someday parent, she has not lost her child forever. Adoption is permanent. If you adopt, the child's birth certificate will be altered to list you and your wife as the baby's biological parents, which is a lie. If you become his/her guardians, the birth certificate remains intact, no one is lying to anyone, and the child's mother can be a part of his/her life if at some point she is able.

Source(s):

Good luck.

Answer 2

You need to get a family law attorney ASAP.

Good luck.

Answer 3

you need to get an adoption lawyer from the state that your cousin lives in different states have different laws that is my best advice to you. Good Luck Hope everything works out for you and your family if that does not work go talk to a Child Protective Services worker they will be able to help you out alot

Answer 4

You would need to get a family attorney ASAP.

I have heard stories about family adopting family, and time and time again it seems that isn't the best of ideas. Even if you have little contact with that relative you've adopted from, sometimes family turns each other against each other, and on and on.

I wish you all the best though, so sorry to hear about this complicated situation.

Answer 5

You need to find a good adoption lawyer - one on each side of the border so that they can tell you what the procedure is for each country. However, I can tell you that you probably can't adopt this baby at birth. Even people like your cousin are entitled to make choices about their children unless they are completely disabled. Bipolar disease is treatable and if your cousin gets stabilized on medications she may be well able to care for hte baby. The hospital was correct only on the point that your cousin will not be allowed to keep her baby in the hospital with her and it will have to go to foster care until she is deemed well enough to be discharged and take custody of her child. In that case the child would most likely go to an American foster home.

Your cousin would have to give her consent to adoption and it sounds like that is not going to happen - at least not right away. Your best bet would be to get a lawyer and let him/her know that you are prepared to be foster parents to this newborn until the situation with the birth parents is sorted out. You say you don't know much about the father but you are assuming he's no better than the mother. That might not be true - he or his parents might be well able to care for the baby and they would definitely have first crack at taking custody of the child if this was the case. If he has disappeared into the ether and is unaware that he got your cousin pregnant and the cousin refused to name him and the law couldn't find him, then he would be eliminated from the possible list of homes for this child to go to. It will be a long complicated procedure for you unless you can talk your cousin into signing the baby over for adoption. And even then you will have the cross-border issue to deal with. There may be another family member in the States (cousin, aunt, step-sister, etc.) who would want to foster and eventually adopt the child if the mother gave it up, and because they are in the States they would be first choice of adoptive parents. You still have four months to go before the birth and if you are serious about providing a home for this child you need to get lawyers started on working out the legalities right now. Also, you can look forward to spending a minimum of $50,000.00 trying to adopt this child. Good luck, and God bless you for your heart in this situation.

Answer 6

First of all, you should be aware that the chances that the child is also bipolar is about 25%. That, on top of the drug issues.

Your best bet is to contact the hospital and the social worker with this case. If she has been involuntary committed multiple times, you may not need her permission to adopt the baby - just the judge's approval. On the other hand, if she committed herself for treatment, at best, you could get guardianship without her permission, but I don't have any idea how that works across country lines.

Answer 7

A court here in the states would have to terminate her parental rights before anyone could adopt the child. He or she would be placed in foster care awaiting adoption. You should be able to adopt the child internationally but I'm not sure if you could foster out of country. I seriously doubt it. I believe the child would have to be placed in a foster home in his or her home state. Before the child is born and taken from the biological mother there is not much you can do about that particular situation. However, you can contact social services where you live to get a jumpstart on the home/family approval process now.

Answer 8

What province are you in?

US/Canada adoptions fall under Internation adoptions.

Here is a link anyway that shows you who does this in Canada.

http://www.canadaadopts.com/canada/resou…

It identifies who does US adoptions in your province.

Good luck.

Source(s):

Proud adoptive parent of a great kid.