What should I do? Should I say sorry?

Question

My bf & I just had a bit of an arguement over the phone & now I don't know what to do.

Here's the situation:
We're together since 26th Dec 08 (but know each other since Aug 08). We're both 21. He's from Iran, but grew up in Irak, Greece & now lives in Switzerland since 1.5 years. I'm half Swiss, half British; grew up in UK, Israel, South Africa & now in Switzerland.
I'm virgin, he's not. I don't have a religion or anything, I'm not ugly (I guess) & I'm not intending to wait till marriage with staying virgin (since I want to marry with like 30 or so). It just didn't happen yet... maybe because the last time I had a serious relationship, I felt too young for it & after that my brother died & I was too sad & didn't feel like having any relationship + I didn't meet the right guy. I also have a bit of a trusting issue, since my ex-bf cheated on me.

Now my bf keeps saying he can wait till I'm ready. However he keeps trying to go further with me & when I tell him, I'm not ready yet, he gets mad & says, he doesn't understand why & that he's a man & it's hard for him to wait. & he says, that he has the feeling, it will never happen between us & that I just want to make him wait to "play" with him (which I swear isn't true!) & that I don't take this relationship serious, like, don't want to take it to the "next level" & that's why he thinks I don't want to have sex with him.
I honestly don't know why I'm not ready yet, but I'm just not & I don't know what to tell him or what to do? :(

Also, we don't see each other much. I work the entire day & have school in the evening & lots of homework & exams, because I'm intending to go to university soon. He has school every morning till 1 p.m. & works normally tuesday afternoon, sometimes also on other days (his boss calls him sponiously when he needs him).
Often I go to his working place at night, when he calls me to come, after I'm actually dead-tired from my working-day, just to see him quickly.
Once I told a friend off, because I thought I would see my bf on that saturday. & then my bf couldn't make it, because his friends mom had died & he had to stay with his friend (which I totally understand). I thought, we'd see each other the next day in the evening, because he kept saying we could probably see other & he'd call me. So I told another friend off & waited for his call. & then he called in the evening & said, he was the entire day with the friend, who had lost his mom, & after that he went home & slept a bit, because he was tired. I was a bit frustrated, because I had waited the entire weekend on him (& my free-time is very precious to me, because I don't have much of it & don't see my friends that often lately either), but accepted it.
Then 2 weeks ago I was in London. I knew, I wouldn't see my bf all week, so I kept my weekend free for him. & then he said, his brother, who had promised to go to another city to help his cousin move, had fallen ill. That's why he'd be going now instead of his brother, so we couldn't see us at all the entire weekend. Even though I was dead tired, because I had only slept like 4 hours, I went to the train station just to see him quickly & then back home in the middle of the night (& I also waited for him for like half an hour at -3° & I also needed 1h to get to the train station & then back home another 1h).
Then last Thursday, my school fell out (normally I would have had school in the morning & had to work in the afternoon). I asked my boss, if I could change my working time that day, so I would work in the morning & be free in the afternoon to see my bf, who also had free time in the afternoon. My boss wasn't exactly happy, but I managed to convince her. Then I waited at the train station that afternoon 35min in the cold outside for him to come. No phone from him, no sms or anything, but when he came, he told me, the teacher had made the school-lesson a bit longer, so he couldn't phone me or anything. However later on in the afternoon, his mom called him & told him, some friend of theirs was at home. So he told me, he had to go home. I was a bit disappointed, but accepted it again.
This weekend I promised my friend to go to the movies with her tonight (saturday night). My bf wanted me to cancel my date with her. But I told him, I had promised it to her long time ago & I hadn't seen her in ages. So, we won't see each other today, because he also left for another city (party of his friend is taking place there).
Last night he was also in another city at his friends place, so we didn't see each other either. I waited for his call. He phoned me at 12 o'clock last night & I was just sooo tired from work, that I had fallen asleep on the coach while watching tv at that time. I woke up from the call, but wasn't 100% awake, when we talked on the phone, so we said, we'd phone the next day. Then we phoned this morning. He said, maybe his family would be gone next weekend, so I could go sleep at his place next weekend. I said, o

Answer 1

Best Answer - Chosen by Voters

this is a guy who is pressuring u into something u really don't want to do yet. he wants u to be available to him whenever, but he isn't making himself available to u. best to wait on the sex part. he wants intimacy but your not even engaged to him. live your life the way u choose, don't put him first. he has allot going on in his life and he doesn't put u first does he?

Answer 2

sorry i didn't expect to read a novel on Yahoo Answer

Answer 3

Honestly,

He is just using you for sex (as it appears from an outside source.) You should wait and find the right guy, but from my perspective. He is not the right one. He's controlling, aggressive and quite mean. I personally even if I were a girl wouldn't sleep with the man either.

Answer 4

Please summarize this.

Answer 5

you should get more stern. you should just be like " i don't want to do it, i'm not ready. if you have a problem with that, i have a problem with you." and if he still wants to do it and is pressuring you, then break up w/ him. also, don't sleep there either.

Answer 6

umm...ok I am seeing what I call a one sided relationship...his side...if you re read your post...you are constantly waiting for him, you are putting your life on hold, he doesn't call, he doesn't save time for you...what do you have to be sorry about? He is sorry, a sorry dude who is being really selfish, any man worth dating will wait until you are ready to have sex, any man worth dating will make time with you...stop waiting, find a man who treats you with respect, who makes plans and keeps them.. you deserve much better!

Answer 7

this questioon is too long, dont ask on computer, meet people instead and explain it, it'll be much easier

Answer 8

Truthfully? He sounds awful.

You have to keep cancelling to meet with him - and then he lets you down??!!

Too be honest, he doesn't deserve you.
You're obviously trying your best to make the realtionship work - constantly trying to meet up with him, and then he just lets you down!

I say call it quits, he just wants sex. From what I've read, he's not putting anything into the relationship.

good luck though, whatever you do
xox

Answer 9

Be free, this relationship is a no go. It isnt your fault nor his. It does sound like he is going to base this relationship on sex, you give and he will take. I think you need to break free. DO NOT give up what you arent ready to give up. If he cant understand that and just keeps trying then that is all he wants and he wont quit trying. I would worry that he may not stop when you tell him either. You sound like a well adjusted young lady, keep you mind straight and remember what you want out of life and KNOW that there ARE men out there that respect that and will honor you for it. Dont let anyone pressure you into something you will regret later, it may effect you your entire life.

Answer 10

Don"t be a fool girl

Source(s):

45 years of lifes ups & down , love is a two way street and remember to love someone is to share a life together.
I have done it all in my life,good and bad some of it I am sorry for the bad that is.